When They Come Back From Deployment...

There are a few things you have to get used to when your husband/significant other returns from deployment:

1.  His Junk Everywhere

“I know you don’t like me to ‘work’ while we’re having ‘us time,’” he said. Now, what in all of the hells does that mean?  There is a ginormous difference between tackling some ridonkulous lawn project (ummm, pictures of my disaster of a front yard to come….later…when someone else promises to fix it) and simply picking up your luggage, yo.  I just wanna walk without stubbing my toe and cursing everything I’ve ever cared about.

2.       Toilet Seats Up/Urine All Over The Place

Okay, I’ve never been bothered by a toilet seat up.  First of all, it’s just not that much effort to put it down, and I haven’t fallen in in the middle of the night, so I’m not enraged just yet.  With that being said, I do like to think it’s possible to urinate without splashing everywhere on earth.  It used to be when I needed to clean the bathroom, there were obvious rings around the toilet bowl saying, “Hey, G, it’s time.”  Now, there’s a terrifying residue of…something…that is screaming my name and begging to be scrubbed.  Well, joke’s on you, pee-stains, I’m as stubborn as they come.

3.       Dishes/Eating Habits

Did you know that if you live with someone else, they expect to eat, too?  Also, did you know that they will not accept cereal and Ramen noodles as an acceptable dinner?  Well, I should probably give you and your digestive system a heads up: all those Healthy Choice meals you’ve been downing for months in order to have a flat stummy and tight butt for your guy are gonna be worthless once he comes home demanding Publix fried chicken and carbs by the ton.  Also, once there’s more than just you eating, there are more dishes to wash.  Will whomever eating’s off of them offer to wash the aforementioned dishes?  No.  Do they care that you just got your nails done on behalf of their return?  No, not at all.

4.       Showers

What’s that?  You enjoyed your shower by yourself, taking your time and washing your hair with the water temperature just right for your hair type?  Well, no, that’s not happening anymore.  Oh, and you only shaved once every four months?  But how am I gonna seductively rub on your legs when they’re prickly and it’s 11:00 at night and you’ve been asleep for 4 hours because you’re on your own internal schedule that works perfectly for you?  Yeah, so the showers are crowded and – while the potential for fun is certainly there – something’s just falling a bit short.

5.       The Bed….oh, girl, The Bed.

I love sleeping.  I love it so much, it’s stupid.  When I’m asleep, I know that I’m missing a huge part of my day and could be doing so much more.  But, whatever, I love sleep and I’m not sorry.  For 6 months, I was sleeping by myself, except for my snuggly puppy and kitty.  But then those 6 months flew by, and suddenly there was someone else in my bed, acting like he owned the place.  My husband.  He was stealing my pillow and my covers, telling me he was hot at the temperature I was completely comfortable with, and sweating his way over to my side.  I mean, this dude dared to roll over to my side without snuggling me in some fashion!  Even Meatwad and Nanner didn’t make that rookie mistake.  Moral of the story is, this dude is all up in my grill every night and it is some kinda miserable.

6.       How Much I Missed Him

Okay, okay, okay…even though I know I can get a little hateful, and even though I tell him he can head back on deployment any old time he wants to, I have to admit that I missed him like crazy.  I wouldn’t trade the feast-dinners and sweaty nights together for a single night I spent alone.  (For now, anyway…talk to me in a few months.)  Sitting on the couch watching TV is so much more fun when you have someone to share your stupid anecdotes with than watching it on your own.  And even when I crave SunChips and pistachios for dinner, he pulls through with a better idea.  Now if I could just teach him to enjoy a good glass (or 8) of wine like I do……… 

How Long Is Deployment?

3 pairs of contacts, tubes of toothpaste, bottles of saline, and packs of toilet paper.
1 pack of sandwich bags and trash bags
500+ miles on the treadmill and bike
2 trips to West Virginia
1 trip to Haiti
126 novels read
10 panic attacks
4 packs of Meatwad’s bones
5 care packages
9 seasons of Seinfeld
10 seasons of M*A*S*H
1 new pair of running shoes
27 times taking out the trash
1 half-marathon!
1 new toilet (finally!)
4 new friends
118 school days
6 packs of birth control
5 cases of tea bags
2 hair cuts
3 house deep-cleanings
8 lawn mows
6 months
27 weeks
182 days
4,382 hours
262,974 minutes

And it’s finally almost over!

My Family Is Killing It Lately

So, I’ve been going through a bit of a dry spell lately.  Nothing too exciting happening, although I did get to see Travis for about 18 hours, which was a fantastic surprise.  I really am seriously spoiled for the next deployment, but I am very thankful for it.

Hotties in shades.

But you know who HAS been doing so much exciting stuff lately?  My family.  First of all, Alison had her baby, Victor Robert Hinkel.  He is absolutely adorable and I can’t wait to squeeze him! 

Aaaaah!  Look at him!

I’m biased, I understand, but he’s also the cutest kid I’ve seen in a long time.  Being an aunt is one of the best things in the world.  If you’re not an aunt/uncle, I would suggest politely badgering your siblings to get on the baby train. 

Also, Sweet & Sassy heard back from Cupcake Wars and was asked to submit a video interview what-not.  They came up with something so spectacular that you just have to watch it for yourself:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKEhkOFtB0Q&feature=player_embedded

I’ve shown it to everyone I know, and my students keep asking if they’ve been selected as contestants yet.  My fingers are crossed so hard they’re starting to cramp!

Travis passed his TACCO board, which means that he is basically a stud.  He's pushed himself so hard and gotten way ahead of the curve, and I am so extraordinarily proud of all of his hard work.

So, what about me, you ask?

Well…today one of my students told me to “snack on [his] balls.”  So there’s that. 

Upon hearing about all of the fantastic things my family is up to lately, my students asked me why on earth I was in Jacksonville and not with them.  Touche, students. 

If anyone sees Alison, Sassa, or Mum lately, please give them a hug and a high-five for me.  They’ve all done some pretty amazing things lately.

In the meantime, I’ll be over here on the couch…drowning my sorrows in Desperate Housewives. 

My Students Is Cray-Cray

After a hectic morning, one of my favorite feelings at work is to eat an apple at lunch.  I have no idea why, but it just feels refreshing and energizing, and I’m nearly ready to tackle the rest of the day by the end of it.  Today, however, I didn’t have an apple in my lunch.

But I did have a bag of mini Twix.

As I sat at my desk and ate so many I made myself sick, I started to realize, dang it’s been a minute since I’ve blogged.  And what better thing to vent about than my students during FCAT week?

To adequately describe my students this week is impossible.  I’d say it’s on par with trying to describe a beautiful sunset over the ocean to a blind person.  They are monsters.  They are hateful, inconsiderate, and mean.  They are forced to take one test and you’d think they were being signed up for boot camp.  Before the test they have to talk to and say goodbye to every person they’ve ever met, because a 70-minute test really is the end of the world.  But I know that it's important to them, and they're stressed out of their gourds.  So I've been praying for and encouraging them like crazy.

...In between stuffing myself full of mini-chocolates.

Also, the big adventurous thing I did recently (aside from driving home by myself and finally getting to see my fam) was get a new tattoo.  I've wanted it for awhile, and looking back on all of my adventures and accomplishments over the past few months, I finally felt I deserved it.

On my right rib.  (Pardon the side-boob)

So there you have it.  PS - my sister, Nalson, is due to have her baby in 2.5 weeks.  Eeeeeeeeeeeek!!

Haiti

I just got back from Haiti on my first mission trip.  I'm really at a total loss of what to say about it, so this will be rambling -- fair warning.  

Needless to say, it was definitely an eye-opening experience.  Luckily, we were an amazing group -- a stone-cold pack of weirdos that meshed perfectly together.

I've lived the majority of my life sheltered from extreme poverty and need, so my first views of Port-au-Prince were shocking.

Houses are constructed from sticks holding up tarps, and placed side-by-side.  People are everywhere, as are animals.

While we were there, we stayed at a placed called Christianville, which is a campus that is home to an orphanage, a school, and many, many big things to come for Haiti.  They are starting a chicken coop to help the Haitian people with sustainable solutions for income, food, and hopefully a better tomorrow for Haiti.  There were also students, professors, and deans from University of Florida conducting research on malaria and cholera outbreaks, as well as many other diseases and issues in the country.  There are big things in store for Haiti through the work that Christianville is doing, and I urge you to check out their website to see all of the wonderful things they have going on: http://www.christianvillehaiti.org/  Bonus: the "main man" is from West Virginia!

What I'll remember most from my trip, though, is the children we visited at various orphanages.  One in particular was run by a man named Odonson (botched the spelling, sorry), who was buried under the debris from the earthquake for 2 days with one of his sons dead beside him.  He promised God that if He would allow him to live that he would open an orphanage for all of the children he could help.  And he sure did it -- his orphanage has over 30 children, and they are all amazing.  Regardless of their circumstances, every one of them had a huge smile on their face.

I fell in love, guys.  Her name is Bigendy and she's 9 years old.  She lost her family in the earthquake and is living at Odonson's.  She is the most pleasant, smiley, goofy person I have ever met.

I would adopt her tomorrow if I could.  Even with the language barrier, she still managed to steal a huge chunk of my heart.  To me, Bigendy is how I will remember Haiti.  In the midst of so much poverty and ruin, the people are incredibly welcoming and positive.

The people I traveled with were fantastic company, as well.  The nature of the trip naturally brings so many different personalities together, and we meshed so well.  I even found people with my sarcastic sense of humor, and it made it so much more fun.  God is really working in Haiti, and in the people of Haiti, and in those working to serve in Haiti.
Okay, other jumbled thoughts:

• We had fresh, handmade bread at every meal.  It tasted like what I would imagine bread would taste like if angels made it -- ohmygosh, it was delicious.  I mean, we even had homemade hot dog buns.  Get. Out. Of. Here.

• I'm gonna miss fresh mangoes like crazy.  And we had a vegetable that was fantastic, but honestly I can't remember the proper word (which was an ongoing joke...no one knew how to say it and everyone said their own version at least 50 times a meal)...maloti? muhlata?  I'm never going to remember.

• You can't flush toilet paper because the septic system can't handle it.  Think about that for a minute.....  Eek, right?

• I saw a tarantula, a huuuuuuuuge spider, lizards, the biggest toad in the history of the world, and various other geegle-worthy insects and managed to not lose my mind.  Be impressed.

Yuck, dude.

• On the way to the airport to leave, the police stopped and boarded our van.  One of the women with us accidentally filmed them as she was filming Port-au-Prince on our drive, and I almost pooped 'em, y'all.  But it turned out to be okay, and they just asked her to erase it.  

• Okay, check out this lady's (yes, it is a lady) hat!  MARSHALL!  Whaaaaaat?!  She randomly came up to me at the beach and started talking, and the whole time I was just freaking out in my brain.  I didn't have anything Marshall on (not that she might make the connection, but you never know) so it was completely random.  Reminds you what a small world it truly is.

I know I didn't do the trip much justice in this post, because I feel like I really could talk about it all day long.  Check out my Facebook photo album and give me a call if you wanna hear me ramble for hours.  I'm gonna end on something extraordinarily personal, so if you wanna stop reading here I don't blame you.  While I was on the plane I wrote out a prayer, and I wanted to share it.  Why?  Because I'm verbose, that's why.

Dear Lord Jesus,
As I'm up in this airplane on the way home from Haiti, there are so many things I think I should be saying and feeling that I'm unsure of where to begin.  But first of all, thank you for the opportunity to go at all on this amazing trip with these wonderful people.  You've recently blessed me with a "jump in!" attitude and it's led me to amazing places and adventures in the past few months alone.Please help me to not take this experience for granted, and to not forget the beautiful people I met--nor their joy in the midst of so much suffering.  Bigendy is heavy on my heart because of the wonderful connection I feel we made.  Please lay your hands over her and bless her life.  Bring her joy and please help her to never lose her wonderful smile and goofiness and heart.  Even if I never see her again (though I truly, truly hope I do soon), please keep her tight in my heart forever.Show me how you would have me continue to serve Haiti.  Guide my heart to your will and be with Travis and I to help us make the right decisions about how to serve your people in your name.  Shape me and Travis into the kinds of servants and stewards and messengers you need us to be.  Help me to spread your word and love for every single day of my life.  
In Your Holy and Precious Name I pray, Amen.

Isaiah 58: 10--"and if you spend yourselves on behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday"

I Ran A Half Marathon and Got Teary About It

Hi There!  Oh, what's that in the picture, you ask?  Just my Princess Ginny bib and medal from the Disney Princess Half Marathon, no big deal...

Okay, I lied, it's a huge deal (to me, anyway).  I know runners are kinda like those CrossFit Crazies and it becomes all they talk about, but let me gloat for just a minute, please.  I am so ridonkulously proud of myself for even signing up for this (but really, it had both Disney and Princess in the title, so how could I not have?), let alone actually going, and then actually finishing.  And heads up: I trained for this one.  Woot!

I ran my butt off, literally and figuratively.  Usually going into a race of any length I just assume my legs and lungs will remember what it was like to be an athlete.  For this one, though, I ran like a maniac almost every day, and hopefully it's become a habit that will continue beyond the finish line this morning.

So, going into this thing somewhat prepared, I was also scared because I felt like I was maybe setting myself up for disappointment (I'm insanely goal-oriented, remember?).  8 miles in, I got a little cranky, but through the awesome signs and texts from my family, I sucked it up--not much of a "wall," thankfully.  Anyway, long story short...this was pretty much the most amazing thing I've ever done in my life.  Yay!

Oh yeah, and there is the small matter of me crossing the finish line and then getting all girly-teary-eyed about it.  I high-fived Mickey right as I crossed, a girl put my medal around my neck, and I got choked up like it was my job.  People were talking to me and I just had the awkward trembly-lip and just smiled like a creeper instead.  But, hey...I just ran 13.1 miles, so it's okay.

Things I Learned While Running

1. Port-a-Potty's will never make you feel better about your life, even if they do make you feel better physically.

2. I want to be a Disney Princess so badly that it makes me want to throw up.

3. Although I started out a skeptic, I want to wear nothing but running spandex for the rest of my life.

"Spandex....ALL SPANDEX!"

4. When you lay down after a long run, the minute you stand up your knees will rebel and try to make your life miserable.  No amount of cajoling will get them to relax.

5. People who run entire marathons are dumb.  Absolutely dumb.

Ummm, Oh Yeah, and There's This -- My mother always (correctly) says that I constantly need to have a project going.  So, now that this running thing is behind me, my next "project" is......Haiti! Yep.  March 9-14 I'll be going to Haiti on my first mission trip.  I guess you could say I really have lost my mind this deployment.

Like A Good Neighbor...

Listen, I'm a terrible neighbor.  Horrific.  The only interaction I've had with any of my neighbors was to do a Walk of Shame after I backed the Jeep into their fence (which, thankfully, didn't leave a mark) at 6am.  (No, I wasn't rude...I fretted about whether or not to say anything all day at school and then almost puked and cried on their doorstep when I finally did.)  So my goal to get out of my "comfort zone" this week was to do something to reach out to my neighbors, which coincides with the theme of our small group at church--it's all about building a relationship with the people around you.  For the old peeps I made banana bread, because I know that's what my grandparents like to have with their coffee.  For the younger families I made confetti cookies and Rice Krispie Treats.  (By the way, if you don't know about confetti cookies, you can find the recipe here--you are so welcome!)  

It was fun to spend the day baking for other people.  When it came time to deliver the goods, though, it was funny how antsy in the pantsy I was about knocking on everyone's door.  But they were so welcoming!  Burl and Imogene (I explained to them how I, too, am a member of the Old Person's Name Club) were so grateful for their banana bread, and they immediately repaid me with a ton of grapefruit from their tree.  Honestly....like 20 grapefruits.  There's no way I can make it through them all, so please come grab one or ten.  Fence neighbors offered to do anything and everything I needed done since Travis is gone.  Across the street, Rhonda asked me to start joining her on evening walks.  I mean, what an awesome "neighbor" thing for us to do together.  And all of the kids on the street made me thank-you cards, too.  

                               

How funny.  All of that because of simple tasty treats.  I am so thankful that I sucked up my jitters and rang some doorbells.  Naturally, my mind is already wandering to the days when our street will host Family Fun Nights and I will babysit the crumb-snatchers across the street.  I'm already picking out our first play for Elizabeth Ann Court's Neighborhood Theatre Troupe.  Okay, maybe I'm getting a bit ahead of myself, but who's to say what kinds of relationships can be built if you simply build up the courage to reach out?  

And seriously, y'all....somebody come share these grapefruit with me.  

PS -- My half-marathon is a week from today (sqwee!) and I found these socks at Target.  Obviously, they were made just for me.  I'll be sporting the pink anchors, along with a tiara, during my race!  You jelly, bro?

My Week in Pictures

It has been a minute, y'all!  In case you didn't hear my shouts of joy, I got to spend a week with Travis mid-deployment, which is entirely unheard of.  He's transitioning from Japan to El Salvador, and was lucky enough to get tasked with having to be in Jacksonville for a week.  It was ama-za-zing!  In lieu of my ranting about it and getting all gushy, here are the highlights in pictures:

We got a dining room table, thanks to Grandma and Grandpa!

We saw Jimmy Buffett!

Our finished table.  I'm in love with our Anthropologie dishes!

Meatwad was so happy to have his snuggle buddy back :o)

We baked and cooked and generally made a scene.

 

And, finally, we spent lots and lots of time with our arms around each other.
**Special shout-out to those pearls, y'all!  Best Valentine's Day gift ever!**

Really, it was fantastic, and I'm sure it's spoiled the heck out of me for future deployments.  But that's okay!  It was extraordinarily hard to say goodbye this morning--goes to show it never gets easier to be away from someone you love.  But I made it through the day, came home and got my hard cry in (just like last time), went for a long run (in new shoes, which helps), and I feel like I'm already settled back into my solo routine.  

With him in a different location now, our time difference isn't quite as extreme.  It kinda reminds me of when we were apart while we were dating: He was doing Navy what-not, and I was finishing up school.  If we could be reunited on May 22, just like last time, well that would be ridonkulous.   

There really are so many things to look forward to: next week is my Disney Princess Half-Marathon, the Gate River Run is just around the corner, as well.  And Spring Break is a little over a month away, so I'll get to be back in WV with my family soon!  (I'm even working on talking my family to come here and drive back with me, so if you happen to talk to 'em, bug them like crazy for me!)  And June will be here before you know it.  

I much prefer life with Travis physically by my side, but as long as he's emotionally there, I think I'll be okay.

PS -- Thank you to everyone for the kind words.  My life is so much better knowing that I have such a strong support system.  I love you guys.

 

Full Disclosure...

I have been having panic attacks.
Whew, that feels better.  Starting 2 weeks ago, I have been having God-awful panic attacks, almost every day.  I think there are a lot of different factors to blame, but I think that holding this information in and not telling anyone really exacerbates the whole ordeal.  So...thanks for letting me vent.
I try my absolute damnedest to be perfect, and I feel like I do a pretty good job of giving the appearance to others that I really have my life together.  But I'm so hard on myself and get so goal-oriented that I often overlook the amount of stress I am capable of placing on myself.  Case in point: I told myself I would run 100 miles in January, and I've been beating myself up over missing a single day.  At school I have things planned so far in advance that I have too much time to just sit with my own crazy self.  I've ended up losing weight and feeling so distant from everything that it's time I stop worrying about appearances and actually get my life together.  My "okay, this is getting ridiculous" moment was when I found myself in the middle of 3rd period, teaching whilst laying on the air conditioner.  As hilarious as that truly was in retrospect, it's time to get things figured out.
So I'm going to start taking better care of myself.  I'm limiting my workouts and eating healthier--and more.  KLove has a 30-day challenge where you try to listen to nothing but Christian music, and I'm taking part in it; so far I really have seen a difference.  But I'm not naive, either.  I know that depression and anxiety is something that runs in my family, so I'll be visiting a doctor next week to make sure everything checks out.
Anyway, thanks for letting me get a ginormous weight off of my shoulders.  If you have a minute and think of it, say a prayer for me, and I'll return the favor whenever you need me.

Goals

I've never been one for New Year's Resolutions.  First of all, it's simply too much pressure, and secondly, I know myself and know that I won't keep it.  So I know that I need something different to motivate myself, and I know that I need a lot of motivation because I have some big things coming up very soon in 2013.

2012 sucked for me.  And for the longest time, I just assumed it was a cursed year; after all, the Facebook consensus seems to be that 2012 was lame for a lot of people.  Then I really started to think about it, and I realize that 2012 didn't suck -- I sucked in 2012.  I made some dumb decisions.  I chose the easy way out a lot, I gave into laziness, and I generally wasn't the best person I could be.  And that's a damn shame, because I really have a lot to offer (excuse me while I toot my own horn here).  

So, 2013 is not going to suck, because I am not going to suck in 2013.  Instead of basing my improvement upon flimsy, cliche resolutions, I'm basing my goals on passages from the Bible that, for whatever reason, have been in my mind lately.

Goal #1: Run, Run, Run!
Isaiah 40:31--But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
This has always been a favorite passage of mine, and I always used it as motivation during punishment runs during softball.  This year, I've signed up for a half-marathon and a 15k, so I need to push myself to train and run and run and run like crazy!  

Goal #2: Show Travis how much he means to me every day
Ruth 1:16-17--"...Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay.  Your people will become my people and your God my God.  Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried.  May the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me."
I am so thankful to have Travis as a husband, and I need to do a better job of expressing that.  I am guilty of letting my bad days at school dictate my moods at home, and I sometimes feel resentment that I have to be away from my family and friends because of the demands of the Navy.  But he is completely worth it, and I need to make it a priority to always express my love for him, even when it isn't easy.

Goal #3: Volunteer whenever possible, however I can
Matthew 25:40--..."I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me."
This verse has been heavy on my heart lately.  I want to learn to love Jacksonville by helping out those in need in any way I can.  I've already started volunteering at the food bank and various soup kitchens and city missions, and I can't wait to find other ways to get involved.

Goal #4: Find a church, attend regularly, and join a small group
Hebrews 10:25--Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another
I'm so stuck on my home church in WV that I've really dragged my feet on finding one to attend in Jacksonville.  But no more!  I've already started my search, and I'm going to take my time in finding one that is a good fit for me.  

So, there you have it.  Not too lofty, pretty easily done, and hopefully I'll find that I'm already well on my way to getting started by next month.  Next time you talk to me, do me a favor and ask me about one of my goals.  Hold me accountable, and if you see me slip up, call me out on it.  

Thanks :o)

How I Spent My Christmas Vacation

I had a pretty amazing time at home and baked my butt off at Sweet and Sassy.  I'm looking forward to the day I can move home and just bake for the rest of my life.  I also got to see Nalson's pregnant self, which is just awesome.  Played games,hung out with the fam, ran a cash register (!), Meatwad pooped all over the house, ate my weight in oatmeal cookies, and--oh yeah!--finished my visit with the flu.

And then I came home, bought a new coffee pot (since I broke the last one), and this happened:

Days Without Coffee-Related Incident: 33 0

Going back to school was rough, but luckily my students kept it interesting by dropping their pills all over my classroom.  Turns out it was Viagra, so I mean...you tell me.  It just reinforces the fact that I could absolutely not make it as a high schooler these days.  Never a dull moment.