Someone Come Get This Bug For Me

I've officially had my first crisis while on my own.  There I was, innocently Skype-ing with Travis, when what should I see out of the corner of my eye but HONESTLY THE BIGGEST ROACH I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE.  The little jerk was just crawling his way across my living room like he owned the place, and of course the dogs and cat are oblivious to the terrifying situation and are egging the thing on.

I couldn't bring myself to kill it, so I smashed it with a 15-lb kettle bell.  He wasn't impressed, and just rolled over instead of being squished like he was supposed to.  So I took advantage of the situation, snapped a picture of the monster, and tried to squish him again.

I'll be damned if I'm going to pick him up off the floor, so there he's gonna stay for the next 6 months.  I at least had the decency to put the kettle bell back on top of him.    But seriously...someone come get this bug for me.