I Ran A Half Marathon and Got Teary About It

Hi There!  Oh, what's that in the picture, you ask?  Just my Princess Ginny bib and medal from the Disney Princess Half Marathon, no big deal...

Okay, I lied, it's a huge deal (to me, anyway).  I know runners are kinda like those CrossFit Crazies and it becomes all they talk about, but let me gloat for just a minute, please.  I am so ridonkulously proud of myself for even signing up for this (but really, it had both Disney and Princess in the title, so how could I not have?), let alone actually going, and then actually finishing.  And heads up: I trained for this one.  Woot!

I ran my butt off, literally and figuratively.  Usually going into a race of any length I just assume my legs and lungs will remember what it was like to be an athlete.  For this one, though, I ran like a maniac almost every day, and hopefully it's become a habit that will continue beyond the finish line this morning.

So, going into this thing somewhat prepared, I was also scared because I felt like I was maybe setting myself up for disappointment (I'm insanely goal-oriented, remember?).  8 miles in, I got a little cranky, but through the awesome signs and texts from my family, I sucked it up--not much of a "wall," thankfully.  Anyway, long story short...this was pretty much the most amazing thing I've ever done in my life.  Yay!

Oh yeah, and there is the small matter of me crossing the finish line and then getting all girly-teary-eyed about it.  I high-fived Mickey right as I crossed, a girl put my medal around my neck, and I got choked up like it was my job.  People were talking to me and I just had the awkward trembly-lip and just smiled like a creeper instead.  But, hey...I just ran 13.1 miles, so it's okay.

Things I Learned While Running

1. Port-a-Potty's will never make you feel better about your life, even if they do make you feel better physically.

2. I want to be a Disney Princess so badly that it makes me want to throw up.

3. Although I started out a skeptic, I want to wear nothing but running spandex for the rest of my life.

"Spandex....ALL SPANDEX!"

4. When you lay down after a long run, the minute you stand up your knees will rebel and try to make your life miserable.  No amount of cajoling will get them to relax.

5. People who run entire marathons are dumb.  Absolutely dumb.

Ummm, Oh Yeah, and There's This -- My mother always (correctly) says that I constantly need to have a project going.  So, now that this running thing is behind me, my next "project" is......Haiti! Yep.  March 9-14 I'll be going to Haiti on my first mission trip.  I guess you could say I really have lost my mind this deployment.

Like A Good Neighbor...

Listen, I'm a terrible neighbor.  Horrific.  The only interaction I've had with any of my neighbors was to do a Walk of Shame after I backed the Jeep into their fence (which, thankfully, didn't leave a mark) at 6am.  (No, I wasn't rude...I fretted about whether or not to say anything all day at school and then almost puked and cried on their doorstep when I finally did.)  So my goal to get out of my "comfort zone" this week was to do something to reach out to my neighbors, which coincides with the theme of our small group at church--it's all about building a relationship with the people around you.  For the old peeps I made banana bread, because I know that's what my grandparents like to have with their coffee.  For the younger families I made confetti cookies and Rice Krispie Treats.  (By the way, if you don't know about confetti cookies, you can find the recipe here--you are so welcome!)  

It was fun to spend the day baking for other people.  When it came time to deliver the goods, though, it was funny how antsy in the pantsy I was about knocking on everyone's door.  But they were so welcoming!  Burl and Imogene (I explained to them how I, too, am a member of the Old Person's Name Club) were so grateful for their banana bread, and they immediately repaid me with a ton of grapefruit from their tree.  Honestly....like 20 grapefruits.  There's no way I can make it through them all, so please come grab one or ten.  Fence neighbors offered to do anything and everything I needed done since Travis is gone.  Across the street, Rhonda asked me to start joining her on evening walks.  I mean, what an awesome "neighbor" thing for us to do together.  And all of the kids on the street made me thank-you cards, too.  

                               

How funny.  All of that because of simple tasty treats.  I am so thankful that I sucked up my jitters and rang some doorbells.  Naturally, my mind is already wandering to the days when our street will host Family Fun Nights and I will babysit the crumb-snatchers across the street.  I'm already picking out our first play for Elizabeth Ann Court's Neighborhood Theatre Troupe.  Okay, maybe I'm getting a bit ahead of myself, but who's to say what kinds of relationships can be built if you simply build up the courage to reach out?  

And seriously, y'all....somebody come share these grapefruit with me.  

PS -- My half-marathon is a week from today (sqwee!) and I found these socks at Target.  Obviously, they were made just for me.  I'll be sporting the pink anchors, along with a tiara, during my race!  You jelly, bro?

My Week in Pictures

It has been a minute, y'all!  In case you didn't hear my shouts of joy, I got to spend a week with Travis mid-deployment, which is entirely unheard of.  He's transitioning from Japan to El Salvador, and was lucky enough to get tasked with having to be in Jacksonville for a week.  It was ama-za-zing!  In lieu of my ranting about it and getting all gushy, here are the highlights in pictures:

We got a dining room table, thanks to Grandma and Grandpa!

We saw Jimmy Buffett!

Our finished table.  I'm in love with our Anthropologie dishes!

Meatwad was so happy to have his snuggle buddy back :o)

We baked and cooked and generally made a scene.

 

And, finally, we spent lots and lots of time with our arms around each other.
**Special shout-out to those pearls, y'all!  Best Valentine's Day gift ever!**

Really, it was fantastic, and I'm sure it's spoiled the heck out of me for future deployments.  But that's okay!  It was extraordinarily hard to say goodbye this morning--goes to show it never gets easier to be away from someone you love.  But I made it through the day, came home and got my hard cry in (just like last time), went for a long run (in new shoes, which helps), and I feel like I'm already settled back into my solo routine.  

With him in a different location now, our time difference isn't quite as extreme.  It kinda reminds me of when we were apart while we were dating: He was doing Navy what-not, and I was finishing up school.  If we could be reunited on May 22, just like last time, well that would be ridonkulous.   

There really are so many things to look forward to: next week is my Disney Princess Half-Marathon, the Gate River Run is just around the corner, as well.  And Spring Break is a little over a month away, so I'll get to be back in WV with my family soon!  (I'm even working on talking my family to come here and drive back with me, so if you happen to talk to 'em, bug them like crazy for me!)  And June will be here before you know it.  

I much prefer life with Travis physically by my side, but as long as he's emotionally there, I think I'll be okay.

PS -- Thank you to everyone for the kind words.  My life is so much better knowing that I have such a strong support system.  I love you guys.

 

Full Disclosure...

I have been having panic attacks.
Whew, that feels better.  Starting 2 weeks ago, I have been having God-awful panic attacks, almost every day.  I think there are a lot of different factors to blame, but I think that holding this information in and not telling anyone really exacerbates the whole ordeal.  So...thanks for letting me vent.
I try my absolute damnedest to be perfect, and I feel like I do a pretty good job of giving the appearance to others that I really have my life together.  But I'm so hard on myself and get so goal-oriented that I often overlook the amount of stress I am capable of placing on myself.  Case in point: I told myself I would run 100 miles in January, and I've been beating myself up over missing a single day.  At school I have things planned so far in advance that I have too much time to just sit with my own crazy self.  I've ended up losing weight and feeling so distant from everything that it's time I stop worrying about appearances and actually get my life together.  My "okay, this is getting ridiculous" moment was when I found myself in the middle of 3rd period, teaching whilst laying on the air conditioner.  As hilarious as that truly was in retrospect, it's time to get things figured out.
So I'm going to start taking better care of myself.  I'm limiting my workouts and eating healthier--and more.  KLove has a 30-day challenge where you try to listen to nothing but Christian music, and I'm taking part in it; so far I really have seen a difference.  But I'm not naive, either.  I know that depression and anxiety is something that runs in my family, so I'll be visiting a doctor next week to make sure everything checks out.
Anyway, thanks for letting me get a ginormous weight off of my shoulders.  If you have a minute and think of it, say a prayer for me, and I'll return the favor whenever you need me.

Goals

I've never been one for New Year's Resolutions.  First of all, it's simply too much pressure, and secondly, I know myself and know that I won't keep it.  So I know that I need something different to motivate myself, and I know that I need a lot of motivation because I have some big things coming up very soon in 2013.

2012 sucked for me.  And for the longest time, I just assumed it was a cursed year; after all, the Facebook consensus seems to be that 2012 was lame for a lot of people.  Then I really started to think about it, and I realize that 2012 didn't suck -- I sucked in 2012.  I made some dumb decisions.  I chose the easy way out a lot, I gave into laziness, and I generally wasn't the best person I could be.  And that's a damn shame, because I really have a lot to offer (excuse me while I toot my own horn here).  

So, 2013 is not going to suck, because I am not going to suck in 2013.  Instead of basing my improvement upon flimsy, cliche resolutions, I'm basing my goals on passages from the Bible that, for whatever reason, have been in my mind lately.

Goal #1: Run, Run, Run!
Isaiah 40:31--But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
This has always been a favorite passage of mine, and I always used it as motivation during punishment runs during softball.  This year, I've signed up for a half-marathon and a 15k, so I need to push myself to train and run and run and run like crazy!  

Goal #2: Show Travis how much he means to me every day
Ruth 1:16-17--"...Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay.  Your people will become my people and your God my God.  Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried.  May the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me."
I am so thankful to have Travis as a husband, and I need to do a better job of expressing that.  I am guilty of letting my bad days at school dictate my moods at home, and I sometimes feel resentment that I have to be away from my family and friends because of the demands of the Navy.  But he is completely worth it, and I need to make it a priority to always express my love for him, even when it isn't easy.

Goal #3: Volunteer whenever possible, however I can
Matthew 25:40--..."I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me."
This verse has been heavy on my heart lately.  I want to learn to love Jacksonville by helping out those in need in any way I can.  I've already started volunteering at the food bank and various soup kitchens and city missions, and I can't wait to find other ways to get involved.

Goal #4: Find a church, attend regularly, and join a small group
Hebrews 10:25--Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another
I'm so stuck on my home church in WV that I've really dragged my feet on finding one to attend in Jacksonville.  But no more!  I've already started my search, and I'm going to take my time in finding one that is a good fit for me.  

So, there you have it.  Not too lofty, pretty easily done, and hopefully I'll find that I'm already well on my way to getting started by next month.  Next time you talk to me, do me a favor and ask me about one of my goals.  Hold me accountable, and if you see me slip up, call me out on it.  

Thanks :o)

How I Spent My Christmas Vacation

I had a pretty amazing time at home and baked my butt off at Sweet and Sassy.  I'm looking forward to the day I can move home and just bake for the rest of my life.  I also got to see Nalson's pregnant self, which is just awesome.  Played games,hung out with the fam, ran a cash register (!), Meatwad pooped all over the house, ate my weight in oatmeal cookies, and--oh yeah!--finished my visit with the flu.

And then I came home, bought a new coffee pot (since I broke the last one), and this happened:

Days Without Coffee-Related Incident: 33 0

Going back to school was rough, but luckily my students kept it interesting by dropping their pills all over my classroom.  Turns out it was Viagra, so I mean...you tell me.  It just reinforces the fact that I could absolutely not make it as a high schooler these days.  Never a dull moment.

Someone Come Get This Bug For Me

I've officially had my first crisis while on my own.  There I was, innocently Skype-ing with Travis, when what should I see out of the corner of my eye but HONESTLY THE BIGGEST ROACH I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE.  The little jerk was just crawling his way across my living room like he owned the place, and of course the dogs and cat are oblivious to the terrifying situation and are egging the thing on.

I couldn't bring myself to kill it, so I smashed it with a 15-lb kettle bell.  He wasn't impressed, and just rolled over instead of being squished like he was supposed to.  So I took advantage of the situation, snapped a picture of the monster, and tried to squish him again.

I'll be damned if I'm going to pick him up off the floor, so there he's gonna stay for the next 6 months.  I at least had the decency to put the kettle bell back on top of him.    But seriously...someone come get this bug for me.